8 signs You’re in a codependent relationship: Say no to power imbalance

A healthy relationship is not all about giving or simply taking. There needs to be a balance so that the relationship remains a healthy one. But there are times when a person makes a lot of sacrifices just to make his partner happy. That’s a codependency relationship that you shouldn’t be in for the sake of your mental health. You may see compromising as your way of showing love. So, if you’re wondering if you’re in a codependent relationship, check out the signs.

What is a codependent relationship?

In a codependent relationship, there tends to be a serious imbalance of power. Often, one person may be giving much more time, energy and focus to the other person, who consciously or unconsciously takes advantage of the situation in order to maximize their needs and wants. Typically, you’ll find codependent behavior most commonly in relationships in which someone has a substance use disorder, but you can have a codependent relationship with anybody, including your boss, friends, colleagues or family members.

Signs of a codependent relationship

There are some warning signs that can help to identify that you are in a codependent relationship. Here are a few:

1. People pleasing
   While wanting to please others is normal, it becomes a problem if your entire focus is on pleasing the other over your own needs at all times, says the expert. Being a people pleaser may make it hard for you to say no even if it interferes with something you need. So, you may end up finding it hard to take care of your own needs and wants or feel like you have no time for yourself.
2. Outside relationships are affected
   You find it hard to spend time with family and friends outside of this relationship. And even when you do spend time with them or on yourself (including your hobbies), you tend to feel guilty or anxious about the same.
3. Poor self-esteem and self-image
   Both you and your partner may have low self-esteem as one of you derives its self-worth from its ability to please the other while the other derives it from the validation of the first person. One of you may also try controlling the other because of a fear of the other leaving them. This can affect their self-image as well as they may lose touch with themselves outside of that specific relationship.
4. Lack of boundaries
   Both people in the relationship tend to have difficulty in recognizing, respecting and reinforcing their boundaries. In codependent relationships, one person may find it difficult to recognize and respect boundaries, whereas the other may not feel the need to reinforce boundaries, notes Aggarwal.
5. Caretaking
   One may feel an immense need to look after the other person in the relationship at all times. That’s not so much out of affection but rather out of a fear that something bad would happen if you do. You may also feel hurt when your caretaking goes unseen or unappreciated, the expert tells Health Shots.
6. Emotional impact
   When one feels responsible for the other all the time, they are more likely to react with either defensiveness or internalize their own feelings when confronted with criticism. This could result in you forgetting your own needs and wants. One may even blame the caretaker for any problems that do arise.
7. Poor communication
   One may fail to recognize one’s own needs and wants which in turn makes it hard to communicate what you need to the other person in the relationship.
8. Dependencies
   Each person needs the other to fulfill a certain need but it also limits both of them from growing up in their own right. One might need help while the other might need validation.

Ways to stop being codependent

Don’t lose hope, as there are ways to bring the relationship back into balance. But it’s important that both the partners work on it together. Some ways to deal with a codependent relationship are:

1. Identify and be aware that you are in a codependent relationship and need to work on it.
2. Get an opinion from someone you trust if you’re confused or unsure about whether you are in a codependent relationship.
3. Rediscover yourself.
4. Remind yourself you are not responsible for the other’s actions, behaviors or feelings.
5. Enhance communication skills and discuss your concerns with each other.
6. Set boundaries.
   Broaden your circle of support.

Pursue your hobbies.

If you are finding it difficult to recognize your own needs or seeking support from others, reach out to a mental health expert who can help you or you and your partner to work through it.

Thank you!
Team – https://www.articlepowers.com/